Posts by Sail Away

14

Update to: As a Matter of Conscience, I Am Resigning from the Christian Congregation of Jehovah's Witnesses

by Sail Away in

i just had a two-hour doctor's appointment (treatment for branch retinal vein occlusion) that requires screenings, scans, dilation, anesthetic and injection, etc.

this makes it necessary to spend a lot of time in the waiting room..

my former p.o., book study conductor and later field service overseer was there and greeted me in a friendly way.

millie210

There is a sub message these days among some of the brighter Witnesses to take a softer approach.

It sounds like your friend is one of those who has internalized that message.

Good for him and you. I hope it makes his life a little easier in the Org and it certainly made it easier for you!

Hope your eye is doing well sailaway!

Vidiot

Sail Away - "...Apparently, the congregation is growing (20% increase) and has lots of children now... I just don't think this can be called growth..."

Neither do I, considering two thirds of 'em will be out within the next couple of decades.

BTW, from reading the rest of your OP, I suspect this elder friend on yours might know a thing or two about the TATT.

Millie and Vidiot, my wish for him is that he has a few years of peace ahead of him. He seems happy and rather well compared to when I saw him last-- over 5 years ago, relaxed and happy. I do hope he and his family are awake to TTATT. For him, I'm sure it's just a matter of it's too late to change. He is 69, and this has been his life. His daughter and son-in-law are born-ins. It is an older congregation, one of the first in the area. They are dying off-- old age, cancers and strokes. One former elder has dementia, but he was always a little nuts-- made for interesting comments at the meetings.

PS Thank you all for you kind concern about my eye. The occlusion happened just over a year ago. At first I had to go for treatment once a month. I just got moved out to every 7 weeks. I regained my peripheral vision (driving with one eye while legal, is a nightmare), and my vision corrects to 20/20, there are just holes in what I see due to tissue damage that won't regenerate. I am unable to do full-time work on the computer anymore, but that's not all bad! I'm taking a year-long teacher training in teaching Mindfulness Meditation. Researchers are working on a time-release medication that would mean only one shot a year, but that is down the road a bit. Could be worse, some go blind from this.

Sail Away

aka Diane

14

Update to: As a Matter of Conscience, I Am Resigning from the Christian Congregation of Jehovah's Witnesses

by Sail Away in

i just had a two-hour doctor's appointment (treatment for branch retinal vein occlusion) that requires screenings, scans, dilation, anesthetic and injection, etc.

this makes it necessary to spend a lot of time in the waiting room..

my former p.o., book study conductor and later field service overseer was there and greeted me in a friendly way.

Sail Away

WingCommander
20% Growth? BULLSH*T!!! There is no way, NO WAY, that a Congregation would see that much growth. What really happened, was that 1 or even 2 or 3 Congregations were dissolved, their Kingdumb Hells sold, and profits sent back to "Mother Org". Then, the pauper Sheeple were commanded to come to your old Congregation. Whaa-laaa! Instant "growth" for your old Congregation. There are lies, damned lies, and statistics. JW's are the masters of manipulating the numbers and statistics in order to make themselves look good.
20% growth in a Congregation? Ha! FantasyLand.

WingCommander, I fully agree. I did ask if the local two congregations had merged, and he said no, there are still the two. Of course, they did gain a few members from another hall closing about 10 years prior, and these two congregations used to have their own KHs and are now sharing one building. They lost some members in the far reaches of the territory who were too old to travel the distance. He said more children and "growth".

I think the biggest "growth" here is that his congregation is the more loving of the two that share the KH. It is the more rural congregation and was always small. I was baptised in 1976 there, 40 publishers back then. What happens is when there is a dust up between family members (Everyone is related in some way!), some migrate over to the kinder, gentler place. The lines are pretty fluid.

Also, as I said in my OP, the smaller, rural congregation traditionally had to "invite" new families with elders, pioneers and/or servants to come and "help". It's a rough go in the area-- high cost of living and few jobs. The imported families often can't afford to move closer and grow tired of the commute. Lather, rinse, repeat.

There are a lot of factors in play, but new "growth" from the field is likely NOT one of them!

14

Update to: As a Matter of Conscience, I Am Resigning from the Christian Congregation of Jehovah's Witnesses

by Sail Away in

i just had a two-hour doctor's appointment (treatment for branch retinal vein occlusion) that requires screenings, scans, dilation, anesthetic and injection, etc.

this makes it necessary to spend a lot of time in the waiting room..

my former p.o., book study conductor and later field service overseer was there and greeted me in a friendly way.

Sail Away

DesirousOfChange
I asked about his daughter and son-in-law. Apparently, they are still active in the congregation and bought a house on the beach and by Dad’s words are “enjoying life.”
The best thing you did was show that you are living a happy and successful life.
Yes indeed!
The greatest revenge is living a happy & successful life!

Doc, your saying came to mind on my way out of the office! So True!

I did give pause to the thought that his daughter and son-in-law might be awake but stuck in due to Dad. This elder's wife died of cancer years ago, and he still grieves for her. If he lost his daughter and son-in-law too, it would likely kill him. That said, the son-in-law was a MS and resigned within a year. I never heard why. Genuinely nice people stuck in a cult.

24

black dog comes to visit

by zeb in

jw
friends

dear friends,.

once again my depression has got the better of me and i must bow out for a time.. "the angels sang glory to god in the highest and on earth peace unto men of goodwill'.

so if that means at this special time of the year then have a happy and safe christmas time all of you.. hugs.

Sail Away

(((Zeb))) Please do take care of yourself, and let us know how you are doing as you are able.

Diane

14

Update to: As a Matter of Conscience, I Am Resigning from the Christian Congregation of Jehovah's Witnesses

by Sail Away in

i just had a two-hour doctor's appointment (treatment for branch retinal vein occlusion) that requires screenings, scans, dilation, anesthetic and injection, etc.

this makes it necessary to spend a lot of time in the waiting room..

my former p.o., book study conductor and later field service overseer was there and greeted me in a friendly way.

Sail Away

I just had a two-hour doctor's appointment (treatment for branch retinal vein occlusion) that requires screenings, scans, dilation, anesthetic and injection, etc. This makes it necessary to spend a lot of time in the waiting room.

My former P.O., Book Study Conductor and later Field Service Overseer was there and greeted me in a friendly way. This is a man that has to have seen my resignation letter referencing child sexual abuse and the ARC; so in his eyes, I disassociated. If for some reason, he is no longer an elder and did not see the letter, at the very least he should be shunning me as a 5-year inactive fader. Also, I know for a fact that I am on the Do Not Call list.

Apparently, the congregation is growing (20% increase) and has lots of children now. Counting baptized minors and elders and servants imported to "help out", I don't doubt the numbers. I just don't think this can be called growth. I did comment that it's wonderful to have kids around and shared a photo of my grandson. I mentioned when my husband and I were first married in 1978, there was so much emphasis on "the end is so near" that having children was hugely discouraged. He said the emphasis now is not on "getting time in", just on "doing the best we can". I asked about his daughter and son-in-law. Apparently, they are still active in the congregation and bought a house on the beach and by Dad’s words are “enjoying life.”

He commented that I look well, happy, am smiling more, and that there is a "lightness" about me. As he knew me well-- as only invasive JW elders do, I did say that I was no longer on meds for anxiety and depression; and I said when I was in the congregation years ago, I took on a lot of pain and anxiety regarding my husband and children's life choices (read Armageddon death sentences). He acknowledged that he knew that. I said now I just live a day at a time and let the rest go. I didn’t mention I was lighter for having a happy family life (something the JWs promised me as a pre-teen that sucked me in to the organization which they later took away by asking me to shun my children) and having dumped the JW burden of guilt and never ever being good enough.

We chatted for the entire time, catching up, and we even hugged good-bye. I would never have guessed! He said, "the friends" think warmly of you". No further attempt to witness to me. There is not a chance in hell that I would ever go back, but this chance meeting further relieves any anxiety about running into the elders. We do live in a very small town.

14

one day convention

by zeb in

jw
friends

well my wife is off to a one day convention and will doubtless return home cranky and tired.

.

Sail Away

Zeb, I have been where your wife is. I understand why she declined your offer to a dinner out. After a day of being beaten down, being told that nothing she has said or done is good enough, being told when to stand up and when to sit down and being told all her unbelieving family will die; she is in so much pain. Please consider surprising her with a simple, light dinner in the quiet of your home, perhaps a plate of cheese and fruit and a glass of wine, if she likes that. Your wife needs to decompress. You can help with that, and it may very well help your marriage.

Big hug,

Diane

35

What age were you when you were counted as a publisher?

by OrphanCrow in

the wts has always included minors and adults in the same categories - publisher and baptized.. i am interested in knowing how many minors, approximately, are included in the publisher count.

and, at what age a person started publishing.

what age was the youngest publisher reported?.

Sail Away

Publisher at 10; baptized at 16 (My non-JW dad made me wait, otherwise I would have been babtized years earlier.)

24

Shunning & separation from family

by CJxfarmx in

i was raised in jw as a child.

my dad was a jw my mom was not, they are divorced now.

i was never baptized or anything but i stopped going once i had the choice at age 12. now i am 41 and my dad will not associate with me, my wife or my 3 kids.

Sail Away

Giordano, beautiful, truthful post.

42

My Ex Wife Admitted She Doesnt Believe It's The Truth

by pale.emperor in

my ex-wife actually opened up to me today over the phone.

she was quite anxious and, i could sense, i little upset.

for those that dont know my situation im separated from my wife.

Sail Away

pale emperor, my heart breaks for you and your little family. I would like to weigh in on the side of compassion for your ex. Please re-read the post by JW Daughter near the top of the second page of this thread. There are so many issues to weigh here. You are both in a whole lot of pain, and the common enemy is the WTBS.

I am not proud to say that it took 30 years after my husband left the organization to wake up, and I still suffer from all the pain that we caused one another as individuals, as a couple and as parents. I am so fortunate to have adult children who have said they understand that anything I ever did was out of love.

Please remember that you were once under undue influence too. We all did things in that state that were certainly not our best moments and likely were not true representations of who we really are as people, otherwise it is not likely that we would be here.

I understand that the harsh words and judgments expressed toward your ex in this thread come from a place of pain. I'm not saying to throw caution to the wind. I'm just advising you to look underneath the fear and anger you both feel and see if both of your actions might, in fact, be motivated by love. Keep in mind that you both cared enough about each other to commit to sharing a life and family together. There is no need to destroy that now. Moving on, if that is where you presently are, is one thing. A scorched earth policy is another.

Out of concern for your child, please support your ex to the best of your ability now when she needs it the most. You know that there is no honorable way to leave this cult. The pain and confusion of cognitive dissonance can be life threatening. It was for me. How could it not. As a wife and mother I loved my husband and children, but felt helpless to save them from what I believed to be certain destruction while at the same time believing that a loving and just God could do no such thing. We were indoctrinated to believe that the only way to save our family is to stay loyal to Jehovah and his organization, a theme that was hammered home with ever more vitriol in the conventions this year.

You know what it is like to lose everything. It takes an extremely strong person to even consider it. I know this because my husband will sit next to me in my dark moments of remembering the past and assure me that I am the most honorable person he knows. That I have always wanted to do the right thing. I simply trusted the wrong people, who were in a position of authority over me since childhood, and they abused that authority. When I woke up to that, I walked away.

Wishing your family peace,

Diane

40

Spain: A group of elder requires clarification to Ministry of Justice regarding sexual molestors

by sp74bb in

jw
friends

letter sent today to the ministry of justice... .

spain bethel sent a letter recently last oct 3 interpreting that no elder or sm should request a certificate of sexual offenses as other churches or persons in contact with kids.

again jw.org interprets the law to their behalf.. a group of elders in madrid has sent this letter to ask clarification !!.

Sail Away

sir82
Trying to wrap my head around Madrid Bethel's reasoning about why registration is not needed....

My neighbor interviewed for a job in Project Youth Court working as a subcontractor for a municipality here in East Coast, USA. If hired, she would be required to carry and pay for a million dollar liability policy that covers child sexual abuse and molestation. Maybe it simply comes down to money? The Org isn't going to pay, and underemployed elders and MSs likely can't afford the premium for the privilege of (shep)herding the flock.

Diane